Micky D's *NEW* Mango Pineapple Smoothie

... with real fruit juice! or just orange juice near as I can tell.

(yum yum yum)


I love those new radio adds for McDonald's new Mango Pineapple "real fruit" smoothies. It is about Steve (not steve Steve, but STEEEEEEVE, read like the voice from WALL-E). Now, we all know this Steve guy. The fantastic, can-never-fail, everything-he-touches-turns-to-gold, smart football player guy in high school with that boring, normal, average kid sibling. In this case, Steve is the already established and supposedly wonderful strawberry/banana and wild berry smoothies, and the kid sibling is the new mango pinapple smoothie. Not a very good comparison since the mango by itself would have been more than enough to out-glamour the previous two smoothies, but then they added pinapple as well and all of a sudden this smoothie is starting to look like the golden child of this smoothie family.

These ads would be more acurate if they compared them to my family. There is me; the oldest not as great sibling, and then there is my little brother; the popular golden pariah of our family. Everyone forgets about the older sibling who was pretty decent and definitely above average when the next child comes along and just blows everyone away. Have you ever been refered to as "[insert little sibling's name]]'s brother/sister" and then thought afterward, "was I really just out-populared by my little sibling?!". Yes, that would be the answer, yes. Sorry, it hurts and these strawberry/banana, and mysery berry smoothies will just have to lick their wounds and try to hang on while the exotic Mango Pineapple REAL FRUIT smoothie blows them away.

At least this is what I thought when I first heard the commercial and started salivating, because as a not so bashful mango enthusiast, everything mango flavored must be sampled. I thought "Pshhh, how can a Mango smoothie even be compared to such mundane fare?! Therefore I had to investigate.

My first Mango Pineapple smoothie: FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC! I didn't think it was possible! McDonalds: known for serving bland tasteless excuses for apple slices, had produced the ambrosial, suculent golden syrup I was unashamedly licking from the plastic cup. It was the eighth world wonder.

just discovered.

by me.

at McDonalds.

I don't know what kind of drugs I was taking that day, or what they had snuck into the flimsy plastic cup, but I haven't had one like that since...
Since that first day, they have all tasted like straight-up orange juice. Orange juice smoothie with an almost indiscernible whiff of mango flavoring. ALL of them. With only the first as an exception, all of the mango-pineapple smoothies I have tasted from the notorious Micky D's have tasted overwhelmingly of orange juice, and that is all I have to say on the matter for now. Case closed. The Mango-Pineapple smoothies taste like orange juice and I will never buy another one again... especially for a $2.50 price tag!

(the normal looking pic)

However, I do agree with the ads, this new smoothie is much better than Steve (ie. the old ones). And strangly enough I really dig the texture.

To each their own,
~M